A Crisis in Confidence

What screenwriting activities did I partake in last week?

1. Asked my mentor/teacher, Anne Jordon, to join me in rewriting the TV pilot that I lost when I spilled coffee on my laptop several weeks ago.
2. Worked on the TV pilot many times during the week.
3. Attended screenwriting group.
4. Asked four movie industry professionals to read my TV pilot when it is completed.
5. Set aside time with a friend to show her how to use a scriptwriting program.
6. Watched four movies and thought about their dramatic structure:

• Love and Mercy - a drama about Beach Boy, Brian Wilson's genius and madness. 
• The Forger - John Travolta played the role of an imprisoned art forger who risks much to spend time with his dying son.
• The Choice - A Nicolas Spark's love story set in coastal North Carolina.
• The Walk - Joseph Gordon-Levitt's stunning performance of the French aerialist that crossed between the world trade center towers on a high wire.

The theme of the week though has been "crisis of confidence." Every time I go to work on rebuilding the TV pilot, I resist stronger than a barn-soured mule being dragged from it's stable.

Mule, watercolor and gel gloss, 10x10 by Levonne Gaddy

After working with Anne one day, I felt motivated to keep at it.  But after three days off from work, I return this morning with the same dread as I experienced immediately after losing the file.

So...this is where I stand at the moment. I tell myself over and over to just do it! One word, one sentence, one scene at a time.

Wish me progress on my journey . . .